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                    "The \"Millennial Thank You Note\" Text Is A Friendship Staple (https://cdn2.bustle.com) (https://cdn2c.bustle.com) (https://imgix.bustle.com) (https://securepubads.g.doubleclick.net) (https://cdn2c.bustle.com/2025/bustle/untitled-sans-web-regular-6c597ffeb0.woff2) (https://cdn2c.bustle.com/2025/bustle/untitled-sans-web-medium-7cb0301cce.woff2) (https://cdn2c.bustle.com/2025/bustle/untitled-serif-web-regular-034b1846ef.woff2) (https://cdn2c.bustle.com/2025/bustle/Acta-Medium-5cc5ca97b9.woff2) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/main-3739e8cc79.js) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/runtime-01570b6452.js) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/vendors-3336c508a0.js) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/CardPage-874e84e9f0.js) (https://www.bustle.com/life/millennial-thank-you-note-i-needed-this-text-friendship-gen-z) (https://www.bustle.com/rss) (/favicon.ico) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/icon-c030f451b3.png) (https://securepubads.g.doubleclick.net/pagead/managed/dict/m202505290101/gpt) (https://cdn2.bustle.com/2025/bustle/Reels-ReelsStack-79acf861ee.css)  (/) (Bustle)    MENU       Viral  Your Friends Deserve A \"Millennial Thank You Note\" A post-hangout text can go a long way, so embrace the cringe.  by (/profile/alexis-morillo-86968123) Alexis Morillo  May 27, 2025     (The text you send your friends after hanging out with them reveals a lot.)        It\u2019s widely understood that humans have a few basic needs to survive: air, food, and shelter. Beyond that, people need more to feel fulfilled. According to psychologist Abraham Maslow\u2019s (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow%27s_hierarchy_of_needs) hierarchy of needs , this includes love, belonging, creativity, and self-esteem. But (https://www.tiktok.com/@issaokamoto/video/7467371551705468206) according to the Internet ? Try a crisp martini on a patio, unpacking the same story from a decade ago, finding out why that couple from your hometown broke off their engagement, or a blurry night out with the company of your closest companions.   Are these needs as integral as oxygen? Of course not. But the texts millennials send after parting ways make it seem as if that quality time is the reason their hearts stay beating. Typically, it includes some variation of \u201cWow, I needed that \u2764\ufe0f. So grateful for you!!!\u201d and henceforth shall be called the millennial thank you note \u2014 not because they\u2019re the only ones sending a post-hang text (they\u2019re not) but because they\u2019re doing it with much more overt earnestness than their Gen Z counterparts. Exhibit A: \u201cYou know when someone texts you right after you get home from hanging out with them and they say like \u2018I had a great time, so nice to see you\u2019? What a gift from God,\u201d said (https://www.tiktok.com/@carlabezanson/video/7305884608887819526) @carlabezanson , 31, in a TikTok with more than 850,000 likes. \u201cThey would always have lunch, even when Miranda had a baby. Getting four women together like that is just not that easy!\u201d Contrast that with Exhibit B: \u201cMe fighting the urge to text my friends \u2018thank you for hanging with me today it was so much fun :D you\u2019re literally the reason i\u2019m gonna see the sunrise tomorrow\u2019 everytime we finish hanging out,\u201d (https://www.tiktok.com/@thatssorav3n_/video/7347657783560490242) @thatssorav3n_ , a college student, wrote in a TikTok with 573,000 likes. See the difference in tone? Younger folks tend to have a more sarcastic way of validating their pals. But why? \u201cI feel like it\u2019s a very Gen Z thing, earnestness through irony,\u201d says Andrew Pattenaude, 27, who frequently sends his group chat a meme after hanging out with them \u2014 specifically the one that says (https://ifunny.co/picture/drake-the-type-of-dude-to-be-laughing-with-friends-7fV5YPfe9) Drake\u2019s the type of guy to look around at his friends and be like \u201cI needed this.\u201d (Viral Drake meme about friends)     Eventually, this became his go-to way of letting people know he enjoyed their time together without getting too corny. \u201cIt\u2019s like a layer of protection to say something that you genuinely feel,\u201d he says. Gen Z, those now between 13 and 28 years old, (https://www.mckinsey.com/featured-insights/mckinsey-explainers/what-is-gen-z) are digital natives , so texting has always been baked into their lives. \u201c[Gen Z] is more used to that constant, more casual contact, especially after COVID,\u201d says Kathryn Lee, LMHC, Ed.M., M.A. \u201cMillennials would probably prefer more of that face-to-face connection, because that is what they grew up with, that is more coded into their systems.\u201d So when they get that IRL quality time, they\u2019re sure to say thank you. Morgan Sullivan, 26, is deeply aligned with her generation. \u201cEven just how I contour my face, I\u2019m like, \u2018This is how (https://www.bustle.com/beauty/alix-earle-acne-journey-hot-mess-podcast) Alix Earle does it,\u2019\u201d she says. So after getting dinner with her girls, she\u2019ll usually send something like, \u201cNeed to queen out like that again soon.\u201d (Gen Z friends tend to be less earnest.)  mihailomilovanovic/E+/Getty Images       The contrast in tone can also be attributed to their life stage. In college \u2014 and to a lesser degree, their 20s \u2014 plenty of people see their crew multiple times a week, and text with the knowledge that they\u2019ll be together again soon. They live nearby and have time to make plans, like Pattenaude\u2019s weekly White Lotus  watch parties. But for many millennials, now between 29 and 44, friendship is inconvenient. They might have moved away, and are more likely to have responsibilities like (https://www.theknot.com/content/average-age-of-marriage) marriage , kids, and work take precedence. ()  Courtesy of Daniela Garrido     Daniela Garrido, 29, is right on the cusp but feels more connected to the older generation. \u201cAs I get older, the more I realize that having friendships is so necessary but so hard,\u201d she says, noting how pop culture staples like Sex and the City  gave her false expectations about adult social circles. \u201cThey would always have lunch, even when Miranda had a baby. Getting four women together like that is just not that easy!\u201d And because Garrido knows how hard it is to make plans, she\u2019s intentional about sending a sincere millennial thank you note afterward. \u201cI fall into sending \u2018I want to do that again,\u2019 because I want to reassure them that it was fun and fulfilling for me, and I hope that it was for them too,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen people make the effort [to see me], I know it\u2019s a big deal.\u201d No, really, it\u2019s a big deal. \u201cFriendship is a relationship, and it takes a lot of effort and time,\u201d says Lee. \u201cBut a lot of millennials who are in these transitional phases (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/intersections/202403/why-are-millennials-the-loneliest-generation) feel really lonely .\u201d Texts like Garrido\u2019s could show your pals that the effort and time were worth the potential inconvenience. (You should be sending your friends a \"millennial thank you note\")  Maskot/DigitalVision/Getty Images     In fact, according to Lee, the millennial thank you note\u2019s earnestness is the best way to nurture your relationships, since the intention can get lost when using Gen Z\u2019s specific flavor of sarcasm, Internet slang, and memes. \u201cYou don\u2019t need to be super gushy-mushy,\u201d she says. \u201cIt can just start with \u2018Hey, that was a lot of fun,\u2019 or even sending some pictures you took and saying \u2018Oh, my gosh. You look so cute.\u2019\u201d Perhaps Gen Z should embrace that cringe, earnestness be damned, and shamelessly send a millennial thank you note after their next yap session. Because, after all, they too probably needed that. \u2764\ufe0f Get Even More From Bustle \u2014 Sign Up For The Newsletter From hair trends to relationship advice, our daily newsletter has everything you need to sound like a person who\u2019s on TikTok, even if you aren\u2019t. (OnDeck) (email@email.com) () (BUSTLE_DAILY) Bustle Daily  (UP_NEXT) Up Next   Submit  By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our (https://www.bdg.com/info/terms-of-service) Terms of Service and (https://www.bdg.com/info/privacy-policy) Privacy Policy       Suggested Reels (Boys Lie Founders Tori Robinson & Leah O'Malley Talk Beauty Must-Haves, Their Personal Style, & All Things Bravo.)  (Expand)   (Bustle Booth with Emily Ratajkowski)  (Expand)   (Kristin Cavallari Reacts To 'Laguna Beach' & 'The Hills')  (Expand)   (Millie Bobby Brown's Go-Tos with Bustle)  (Expand)             (/) (Bustle)   SEARCH   CLOSE    (Search Bustle...)      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                    "It\u2019s widely understood that humans have a few basic needs to survive: air, food, and shelter. Beyond that, people need more to feel fulfilled. According to psychologist Abraham Maslow\u2019s hierarchy of needs, this includes love, belonging, creativity, and self-esteem. But according to the Internet? Try a crisp martini on a patio, unpacking the same story from a decade ago, finding out why that couple from your hometown broke off their engagement, or a blurry night out with the company of your closest companions.Are these needs as integral as oxygen? Of course not. But the texts millennials send after parting ways make it seem as if that quality time is the reason their hearts stay beating. Typically, it includes some variation of \u201cWow, I needed that \u2764\ufe0f. So grateful for you!!!\u201d and henceforth shall be called the millennial thank you note \u2014 not because they\u2019re the only ones sending a post-hang text (they\u2019re not) but because they\u2019re doing it with much more overt earnestness than their Gen Z counterparts.Exhibit A: \u201cYou know when someone texts you right after you get home from hanging out with them and they say like \u2018I had a great time, so nice to see you\u2019? What a gift from God,\u201d said @carlabezanson, 31, in a TikTok with more than 850,000 likes.\u201cThey would always have lunch, even when Miranda had a baby. Getting four women together like that is just not that easy!\u201dContrast that with Exhibit B: \u201cMe fighting the urge to text my friends \u2018thank you for hanging with me today it was so much fun :D you\u2019re literally the reason i\u2019m gonna see the sunrise tomorrow\u2019 everytime we finish hanging out,\u201d @thatssorav3n_, a college student, wrote in a TikTok with 573,000 likes.See the difference in tone? Younger folks tend to have a more sarcastic way of validating their pals. But why?\u201cI feel like it\u2019s a very Gen Z thing, earnestness through irony,\u201d says Andrew Pattenaude, 27, who frequently sends his group chat a meme after hanging out with them \u2014 specifically the one that says Drake\u2019s the type of guy to look around at his friends and be like \u201cI needed this.\u201dEventually, this became his go-to way of letting people know he enjoyed their time together without getting too corny. \u201cIt\u2019s like a layer of protection to say something that you genuinely feel,\u201d he says.Gen Z, those now between 13 and 28 years old, are digital natives, so texting has always been baked into their lives. \u201c[Gen Z] is more used to that constant, more casual contact, especially after COVID,\u201d says Kathryn Lee, LMHC, Ed.M., M.A. \u201cMillennials would probably prefer more of that face-to-face connection, because that is what they grew up with, that is more coded into their systems.\u201d So when they get that IRL quality time, they\u2019re sure to say thank you.Morgan Sullivan, 26, is deeply aligned with her generation. \u201cEven just how I contour my face, I\u2019m like, \u2018This is how Alix Earle does it,\u2019\u201d she says. So after getting dinner with her girls, she\u2019ll usually send something like, \u201cNeed to queen out like that again soon.\u201dmihailomilovanovic/E+/Getty ImagesThe contrast in tone can also be attributed to their life stage. In college \u2014 and to a lesser degree, their 20s \u2014 plenty of people see their crew multiple times a week, and text with the knowledge that they\u2019ll be together again soon. They live nearby and have time to make plans, like Pattenaude\u2019s weekly White Lotus watch parties.But for many millennials, now between 29 and 44, friendship is inconvenient. They might have moved away, and are more likely to have responsibilities like marriage, kids, and work take precedence.Courtesy of Daniela GarridoDaniela Garrido, 29, is right on the cusp but feels more connected to the older generation. \u201cAs I get older, the more I realize that having friendships is so necessary but so hard,\u201d she says, noting how pop culture staples like Sex and the City gave her false expectations about adult social circles. \u201cThey would always have lunch, even when Miranda had a baby. Getting four women together like that is just not that easy!\u201dAnd because Garrido knows how hard it is to make plans, she\u2019s intentional about sending a sincere millennial thank you note afterward. \u201cI fall into sending \u2018I want to do that again,\u2019 because I want to reassure them that it was fun and fulfilling for me, and I hope that it was for them too,\u201d she says. \u201cWhen people make the effort [to see me], I know it\u2019s a big deal.\u201dNo, really, it\u2019s a big deal. \u201cFriendship is a relationship, and it takes a lot of effort and time,\u201d says Lee. \u201cBut a lot of millennials who are in these transitional phases feel really lonely.\u201d Texts like Garrido\u2019s could show your pals that the effort and time were worth the potential inconvenience.Maskot/DigitalVision/Getty ImagesIn fact, according to Lee, the millennial thank you note\u2019s earnestness is the best way to nurture your relationships, since the intention can get lost when using Gen Z\u2019s specific flavor of sarcasm, Internet slang, and memes.\u201cYou don\u2019t need to be super gushy-mushy,\u201d she says. \u201cIt can just start with \u2018Hey, that was a lot of fun,\u2019 or even sending some pictures you took and saying \u2018Oh, my gosh. You look so cute.\u2019\u201dPerhaps Gen Z should embrace that cringe, earnestness be damned, and shamelessly send a millennial thank you note after their next yap session. Because, after all, they too probably needed that. \u2764\ufe0f"
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